Years ago, psychologist Martin Seligman conducted a series of now-famous experiments with dogs. In these studies, the dogs were placed in chambers with floors that delivered electric shocks. Some of these chambers had an escape route—others didn’t.
The dogs who couldn’t escape eventually stopped trying. They lay down and accepted the pain. And here’s the disturbing part: even when they were later placed in a chamber where escape was possible, they didn’t move. They had learned that nothing they did would make a difference—so they gave up, even when freedom was within reach.
That’s a chilling image, isn’t it?
But also… painfully familiar?
Because, in many ways, we’re not so different. Every day, we’re bombarded by subtle (and not-so-subtle) messages telling us we’re not good enough, not beautiful enough, not successful enough. Over time, it chips away at us. We internalize the criticism, swallow the rejection, and carry on—smiling on the outside while feeling small, stuck, or broken on the inside.
We call it learned helplessness—the belief that no matter what you do, nothing will change. And just like those dogs, we sometimes stop trying to escape our emotional pain. We stop believing in the possibility of better.
But here’s the good news: what’s learned can also be unlearned.
Just as we gradually learned helplessness over time, we can also learn strength. Resilience. Hope. Confidence. It doesn’t happen overnight, but with the right tools, support, and mindset, change is possible. One small step, one day at a time.
If you’ve ever felt like you’re stuck in a situation with no way out, know this: you’re not alone, and you’re not powerless. The door might already be open—you just have to learn to see it again.
And you will.